“Peeus Waiticus” aka Waiting to Pee
Posted By Christa On August 31, 2008 @ 2:57 pm In Humor/Laughter,Soap Box | Comments Disabled
A common health condition called “Peeus Waiticus” is on our Giggle On!™ Soap Box today.
When translated from pig-Latin, “Peeus Waiticus” means Waiting to Pee [2]. WTP is a serious problem affecting both males and females.
WTP has been known to cause kidney infections, urinary tract infections & stomach aches. WTP can also lead to embarrassment and wet bottoms.
Why do so many of us wait until it feels like our bladder is going to explode before hitting the bathroom?
Why waste time squeezing our legs together, rocking back and forth, shaking, holding our hoo-ha area, dancing around and jumping from leg to leg just to stop ourselves from having an accident when the easy remedy is to simply head to the Loo? Why? W-h-y? WHY?
I hypothesize that some people WTP because they enjoy the attention they receive from others while engaged in a practice the ancient Romans called, Trepudio Plenum Vesicum or Dance of the Full Bladder*. In modern society we simply call this the Pee Pee Dance [3].
Giggle On!™ conducted a Pee Poll to find out why people wait to pee.
2% said:
We wait to pee because we are too lazy = abbreviation, TLTP.
4% said:
We are afraid to pee because we believe snakes, alligators and bugs will climb up out of the potty and bite our ass = abbreviation, ATP.
6% said:
We can’t pee because we are in the middle of having sex = abbreviation, WCP.
7.43% said:
We would love to pee, but our bodily plumbing is seriously out of whack = abbreviation, WLTP.
27% said:
We wait to pee because we are driving in the car, stuck on a bus, grossed out about public toilet seats, paranoid that the lock on the bathroom stall won’t hold or afraid someone might see us peeing = abbreviation, WTP.
But wait, there’s more!
A Whopping 43.57% said:
We are too busy to pee because we are reading email, making phone calls, driving the car, writing in our blogs, watching tv, taking out the trash, caring for the kids, walking the dog or folding laundry = abbreviation, TBTP.
I admit I suffer from this dangerous and stupid behavioral affliction too. I gave myself a nasty UTI from WTP. WTF Christa? Pee girl, just pee!
Hell, I have to pee [2] right now but I’m still tapping away at the key pad because the importance of expressing this subject matter is too great for me to wait. I fear by the time I come back from the potty I may have lost a stream of consciousness (pun intended) and my deep wisdom about Peeus Waiticus might be lost forever!
And I sit and rock back and forth, back and forth…… ooooh, ouch…hold that thought, I’ll be right back.
*insert Jeopardy think music [4]*
Ok, I’m back. Ahhhhhhhh, sweet baby Jesus, that’s soooooooooo much better.
In closing my fellow Gigglers, for the love of God and the health of your body temple, DO NOT succumb to WTP, TLTP, TBTP, ATP or WCP because you might get a UTI!
For those who suffer from WLTP, please see your physician immediately.
Bottom line: When nature calls – Giggle On advises you to ANSWER!
Cheers to your urinary tract health!
Giggle Girl Giggling OUT!
*Source: My Dad
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URLs in this post:
[1] Tweet: https://twitter.com/share
[2] Pee: http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com/2008/10/how-to-win-pissing-contest.html
[3] Pee Pee Dance: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=pee+pee+dance
[4] Jeopardy think music : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4003xkcTJmI&feature=related
[5] subscribe to my RSS feed: http://www.giggleon.com/feed/
[6] : http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/SuzanneSays/~3/376718803/
[7] : http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/NewAgeBitch/~3/378999239/
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Comments Disabled To "“Peeus Waiticus” aka Waiting to Pee"
#1 Comment By Suzanne Says… On September 1, 2008 @ 7:41 pm
I’m definitely in the TBTP group…ridiculously so.
Suzanne Says…s last blog post.. [6]
#2 Comment By Tasha On September 1, 2008 @ 7:56 pm
Well cheers to your bladder, and greetings in the name of the all Mighty Urinary Tract!
That was well put cause you know me I will wait to pee! Okay really we all should listen to our bodies and what they tell us so that we don’t cause our body to SHOUT OUT LOUD!!!!
As always Christa, another great blog see you soon!
#3 Comment By New Age Bitch On September 1, 2008 @ 8:27 pm
I thought I was lazy but it turns out I am just too busy to pee. Busy is better, right?
New Age Bitchs last blog post.. [7]
#4 Comment By cathy On September 15, 2008 @ 7:18 pm
I’m a TBTP for sure – case in point – I have to go now but this is much more important!
#5 Comment By Margaret (Nanny Goats) On October 12, 2008 @ 10:45 pm
LOL! Yes! The Pee-Pee Dance! I had forgotten that term. Dang. I wished I’d used that in my blog post.
[2]
#6 Comment By karen kocienski On November 17, 2008 @ 4:44 pm
Two women friends had gone for a girl’s night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives, however They had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.
Incredibly drunk and walking home they needed to Pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.
One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them.
Her friend however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them.
She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that.
After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home.
The next day one of the woman’s husband was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said:
‘These girl nights have got to stop! I’m starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties!!’
‘That’s nothing’ said the other husband, ‘Mine came back with a card stuck to her ass that said…..
‘From all of us at the Fire Station. We’ll never forget you.”
#7 Comment By Ben On December 10, 2008 @ 10:57 am
Yep, I’m definately a TLTP. Now I have a catchy acronym for my “condition.” Sweet. Just what I was looking for. Wiggle On.
#8 Comment By Annie On March 18, 2009 @ 8:39 am
Well, I’m certainly not too busy having sex to pee…so I’m thinking that I’m just too darned busy to pee.
While on that note, I do have a nice little tip about peeing for your readers, and with the MS Walk approaching, I believe it’s timely:
NEVER (EVER) DRINK A TALL COFFEE AT THE START OF A CHARITY WALK/RUN. Just don’t do it. Especially if it’s at the WLM Riverfront. It’s a long way to the public bathrooms!
PEE ON!
Thank you.
#9 Comment By Christa On March 18, 2009 @ 9:32 am
Pee On! *laughing* Good one!